TITA

I never expected that everything would come at this point. Since I first entered college. I thought  they already know the perks of a college student, the ups and the downs. But I was wrong..

I've been living with her for 16 years.. Sixteen years and maybe, counting..

She was the first person I thought who could hurt me big time (except for my mom), and yeah she just succeeded. Now, I'm trying my best to not associate myself with her anymore. She's like my best friend.. I mean, it's in her where I find comfort sharing my problems and all and I really though she's my "kakampi". But then again, I was wrong..

MABING, I used to call her that way. She's my Mama as well as my Tita. I love her as much as I love my mom. I cannot afford losing her. But hearing those painful words from her crashed my own understanding of the word, love and family. I don't even know if I still have a family after this. Because honestly, I don't feel like I belong to one.

Mabing, I'm sorry if I've been so stubborn and stupid and everything. I just don't know how to please all of you.. I mean you, Mommy, Mama, Tito Boy and all of our family members. Even though I exert too much effort just to make you proud, I feel like it's just not enough. I'm sorry for being such a big disappointment and all. I'm sorry for hurting you.. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for being so inconsiderate. I just have lots of things to say sorry for.

Thank you for being there with me. Thank you for the understanding, the love, and the care.

Now, I'll be off your way. I'll try to be independent enough. I've caused you too much trouble and I've ruined your life. I've been a nuisance this past few years. I know that.. and I'm sorry if I'm like that.

As you always say, I'm like my biological father. Maybe you're right after all. Don't worry, I'll go find him when I have enough cash and time so I'll confirm it myself. And when that time comes, I don't know if I could still bear the pain. And when I get to realize that I am so much like my father, then I'll be off your lives, I guess. Because I've been a pain in the ass for so long now. I'm sorry once again.

I love you.. and I always will.

I love you, Ma Bing.